What the heck it been a year since I've thought about posting. A year since I thought about the need to continually share/comment and be active on blog social media.



I stopped writing here because Scotland and my PhD weren't everything that I had hoped for. Being here alone made me miss and desire things that Edinburgh and my PhD wasn't providing.

Stepping away from this for a year and the constant reminder of being a 'Grad student exploring NC to Scotland' helped me to reevaluate. Well, in all honesty, the reevaluation was a recent development.

Things are starting to get a bit better in my PhD life, I'll write on that later. Things in my personal life are better now with the BF here. I am working on just getting better in general, from my health to my head, I needed a wake-up!

Scotland was supposed to be this dream of a lifetime, a PhD project that was going to be badass and a chance for me to explore, grow and figure shit out. After 16 months here I am finally getting around to all of those things. Hints the new blog start, the refresh, the saying 'Hello' after a year of nothing!


So welcome back to ChemGradBoom, if anyone still remembers the blog!

I hope you stick around to see the new CGB, the new travel adventures, the new PhD madness and all that I have to offer!

Moving to Edinburgh meant that I would now be in Long Distance Relationship (LDR) for the 4th time since I have been with the BF. Since we met when he was in the Army, there was the year-long deployment followed up by my 6-month move to Indianapolis.

We met when I just turned 18 and was about to head off to college, with myself having no interest in ever dating an Army guy I met the tall guy who got a turkey with me in bowling. Little did I know that after meeting him, my no dating Army guys rule changed and almost 7 years later I am still stuck with the tall guy.

To be honest, when we said to goodbye to each other as he deployed after knowing each other for a little less than a year and dating for about 4 months I didn't see where the relationship would go. I was 18 in college and saying goodbye to a guy that was absolutely fantastic but still I was saying goodbye for a year. The deployment made our relationship what it is today, and while 18 years old me had no idea that we would stay together, today I look at that year as something that has made all the other LDR moments easier.





To start LDRs make you really learn to communicate. While the communication aspect was a little tricky when he was deployed we relied on the random phone calls, sometimes Skype, lots of Facebook messages and a journal for each of us that we sent back and forth every month or so. I learned how to actually listen and realise when he was in a lousy mood, exhausted, or needed just to talk. I also figured out that while he may have been 5,000 miles away in a war zone, he was still there to hear about the things that I would tell him if he was there next to me.



The next thing that I think we have managed to take from every moment of our LDR is to appreciate the moments that we do have together. When the BF came home for R&R during deployment, we managed to have a jet-ski incident leaving me with 15ish stitches in my nose along with some severe bruising. Every bone in me wanted to stay out of the public because I looked terrible, yet I knew that in 1 week the BF would be back to Iraq. So instead of staying in and ruining the last week together, we still went out and did all the things that we planned on. While I did get some terrible stares, we enjoyed every awkward moment of that week and am glad that the BF stuck with me even with the bruised face and messed up nose.



The last thing that I realised from being in an LDR is that having a life outside of being the relationship makes things much better. I have seen couples who seem to only be happy when they are together, they are always the people sucking face on nights out with friends, they are the ones who bail to spend time in bed with each other rather than celebrate a birthday with friends. While there is nothing wrong with loving to spend time with each other, you have to have a life outside of being a couple. I love having the BF with me and yes I would prefer to have him with me all the time, but I realised that to be happy you have to have a balance.



In the end, I know that an LDR is hard, it is filled with moments of doubts, tears, happy moments that make your face hurt from smiling so much, and a person who you can spend 365 days apart for the one day that you are back together.

If you have/are in an LDR what are some things that it has taught you? I would love to hear what you think about being in an LDR!

Moving to Scotland and starting my PhD program is much different than I imagined how my PhD would go. To start things off my advisor week one told me to 'relax and get settled' meaning that Week One of school I aimlessly wandered around or on cold days binged on Netflix. Then there is Week Two, the week we were supposed to meet, but thanks to an old roomie from the IMA in London, I made a quick trip to visit! Meaning two weeks into my PhD and still nothing! Finally Week Three came, and I finally met my advisor/supervisor and my secondary supervisor, fears about this meeting deserve a whole other blog post. After the meeting, I was handed some readings and told that research would be done when the weather is nicer. This meant that my only assignments were to read, read, and read some more. Know I love the being in a lab/doing the research, the other aspects aka the reading nonstop, not really my thing. 

Unfortunately  Year One of a PhD student = Lots of Reading..... 

With this new life of nonstop reading and taking in the knowledge, I have had to learn to trick myself into getting shit done. Which is why I have figured out 5 Tips that keep me motivated to read on or just do work in general. 

1. set a goal for the day/hour/30 minutes. 

Yes, 30 minutes... Working towards an end goal is much easier than just working. So an example of this is saying I will read one chapter and take notes in 3o minutes. I then move on to tip 2. 

2. REWARD YOURSELF. 

With a piece of chocolate, a coffee, a new Kate Spade bag, whatever... Of course, the reward size should be based on the amount of work you do. For me I say reading one chapter means I get 15 minutes free time, reading three chapters is one episode on Netflix. Finishing year one will be a Kate Spade bag or a trip, probably both being honest. 

3. blast your favourite playlist or have your favourite show/movie on. 

#1989 seems to be my jam lately, and I have it on repeat when I need to focus and get work done (no lie listening to it RIGHT now as I am writing this post #getblogpostdone). Sometimes I fall back to my Harry Potter marathon, which means I can crank out 4-5 solid hours of work without distractions.

4.work in a group.

One advantage to living with undergrad chemistry students in Scotland is the amount of work that they have, which means group work-together happen in the living room at least twice a week. Telling each other to get shit done is much easier when there are multiple eyes to catch you not being productive. 

5.get out and do work.

Lastly, head out and do work. This could also be a reward for one full day of working at home. I personally love to head out to a coffee shop and do work, of course, it is one with free wi-fi. Not only is getting out to a new environment mentally stimulating, but it also gets you out of your typical anti-work habits (aka laying in a cosy bed and watching Netflix #alldaylong).  Well, there it is, the list of 5 things that have been helping me to be a productive PhD student or at least a semi-productive PhD student! Now that I have this blog post done, I am off to read another chapter about historic window glass! 

Any tips that you have for staying productive? I would love to get advice that others use!

1. Grad School sucks the life out of you, day after day, but still, it ends up being an amazing 2-5 years. 
2. First finding the 'RIGHT' grad school seems to be a never-ending task, so when find the right school take the offer as being happy can be better than taking the school offering the most money.
3. Having to find your first off-campus house in fun and exciting (hello Pinterest worthy living spaces) until you have to pay a deposit, rent, and all the utility bills and get stuck with a shitty landlord. 
4. Finding your advisor 'can' be fun, that is until the advisor you really want to work with tries to talk you out of it 3 times at an hour each and all of the grad students warn you against him. But my advice: go with your gut, chose someone whose research interests you. 
5. Accept the fact that after your done with your degree, you will be a semi mini-version of your advisor. I now listen to Reggae music when doing research, have a constant supply of snarky comments to share, and respond with the word 'check'. I am now a mini version of Coach, and while I pretend to hate it all, he has really helped/taught/mentored me!
6. Classes are not all that bad, although there will be moments where you swear off another semester of grad school. Push through, it gets better!!!
7. You will get very close to the other grad students in your program and ones that are in your lab. They will understand the bullshit request of Dr E and the crazy revisions requested by Dr H. They will be there for support, nights out, the good times, the bad times, and there to celebrate with you when it is all over. 
8. Grad school is like a full-time job, except with a more extended winter break. Yes, only a winter break because during the summer you will be at school working away! Trust me though you will probably be way more productive during the summer, no other students to deal with. 
9. CAFFEINE, COFFEE, AND MORE CAFFEINE = Survival. 
10. Speaking of beverages to survive through grad school, add some beer. De-stressing is necessary, and alcohol helps with this. So find a local bar and enjoy! Trust me the hard times require some liquid encouragement to go back the next day and get shit done!
11. You will need to stop being a procrastinator. Shit does not work in grad school. Sure you will have to pull all-nighters, but generally, it is because your research has failed for the 10th time and you have a presentation to get ready for. 
12. Grad School will teach you that it's ok to fail and that you should be damn happy about the few successes. 
13. Speaking of failures, you will think of dropping out. It's ok, I did it on a bi-weekly basis until I was working on my thesis and it was the daily basis. School is hard, especially grad school, but stick with it, and you will make it through, eventually.
14. You will have to take steps back every now and then and press refresh, burnout is a real thing. Learning to push through exhaustion, however, is part of the learning experience. 
15. Lastly, while I joke about how grad school is terrible, that my advisor sucked and that I wanted to drop out. In the end, you will look back (most likely at your completed thesis) and say suck it grad school, I kicked your ass! 

1. Trying to book the perfect plane ticket. I don't want to leave to early ( I have to make sure to say all of my goodbyes) and I want to start early enough so that I can kinda settle before orientation on Jan. 12th. Oh, yea and I also depend on my leave date based on ticket prices #cheapcollegestudent
2. PACKING..... What can I say, I am moving for 3 years meaning that I will need to pack things for all 4 seasons, books/research stuff, holy technology (3 laptops, 1 camera, phone, etc.) and all of the other stuff aka clothing/shoes. Plus I have to pack it all in 2-3 suitcases...
3. MONEY like any other poor college student, the money conversion and being broke terrifies me. Yes, I have quite a lot of saving, but I know how quite a lot (for me anyway) may not go that far. As for figuring it out, I think for at least 6 months I should be good to go and then after that will be interesting! 
4. Finding a place to live. This is actually number one, but I was trying to go in some type of chronological order. And yes you read that correctly, I have no place to live yet! I have been looking at a couple of websites for flatshares, but until I am there, it is just hard. 
5. Starting a PhD program. Yikes, another degree, school and advisor. All of these things are terrifying. Questions like- What if I am not what they expected? What if I am not smart enough? What if I just suck in general? Are only a few of the ones in my head. 
6. Navigating Scotland. Being from America and where I grew up, public transit was not something that I ever used! Personally, I am excited about the idea of not having to drive, but the idea of making it everywhere via walking/public
7. Meeting people. I love to have a social life, a tiny one, but none the less a social life. I am hoping to find a place that will have roommates open to social nights out and helping to show me the city. 
8. Being alone. I guess this should have higher as well. I am moving away from family and away from JC. For the last 6 years I have had fantastic support with JC always being there to push me, and of course, my family has always been there. 
9. Travelling. I personally want to see everything and anything that I can. I want to utilise my time in Scotland making sure that I not only explore Scotland but other places. While this is something that excites me, it is also something that scares me. My love for adventure is both expensive, exhausting and exhilarating. 
10. Seeing how I will change. I am not sure that this scares me, but I do know that my life outlook will change. I am moving to a foreign country, I am starting a PhD, and I honestly have no idea what is in store for me!